Army Men games, what were they really like?

[Sketcz]

Must admit I have a fondness for acquiring and playing games loathed by many. Simply to see what all the fuss is about. A good example is Snake?s Revenge on the NES, which I discovered to be excellent, and even Kojima recently said he likes and regards it as faithful.

And so I continue to look for such games.

But what were the Army Men games like? General consensus is that they bankrupted the 3DO company. But there were so many versions released, it was a massive series, which I'm told sold in the millions. Surely if they weren't selling, the company would have stopped developing them?

Has anyone played the many various titles? What was the gameplay like? Were some better than others?

More importantly, what was actually wrong with the games? I?ve never played them.

I mean, I used to love real toy soldiers. When I was about 5 or 6 I had literally hundreds of them which I?d all lay out, and then me and my brother would have a huge battle that inevitable resulted in everyone dying, and plastic green soldiers being thrown everywhere.

How can you make such a brilliant concept as army men not work?

I haven?t actually seen any copies for sale in nearby second hand stores, and so I?m extremely curious to find out what they?re like.

Any thoughts?

[Big Seany]

My seven year old lad loves the Army Men games, however I find them horrible to play with clunky controls, **** graphics, rubbish camera, etc etc.

This is the same lad who will sit and play Shadow the Hedgehog or Ultimate Spidey over Metal Slug 3.

Like you say though, it is potentially a brilliant concept, although if I want to play with little coloured soldiers then Advance Wars all the way, baby.

oh, and John - if you want PS1 copies of any of the Army Men games, then I can guarantee you a couple next time I am in Crime Converters or up the boot sale. Let me know!

[Sketcz]

Ahh, so the kids quite like it then? Youngsters today hey? It was all so different long ago.

Thanks for the offer of the games though, I'll see what others say about them, and then might take the plunge.

[Baseley09]

I have a bootleg with 3 of the games on one disc, mostly i still rekkon they are awful, especially the dodgy graphics, but one of them was pretty fun, ill dig out to find out which hehe.

[cutmymilk]

The first one was OK (was it called simply Army Men or Army men 3d?), the rest were just quickly developed, desperate cash ins.

[Leon Retro]

I played a version on the N64 ages ago, and it was a bit like Desert Strike meets Commando. There wasn't anything special about it, but it wasn't as bad as some people suggest, and I found it mildly entertaining.

This is it.. not bad imo!

[Sketcz]

Indeed. I tried a demo of the DC version today. Production values were a little low (it looked like a PS1 game), but it wasn't actually bad. Mildly entertaining, and a lot better than some of the atrocious games I've played in my time.

I'm going to get criticised for this by Seany, our resident 2D and retro guru, but I actually chuckled when a plastic soldier commented after getting attacked, that it was merely "a plastic wound".

[Samurai Matt]

What genre were these games anyway?

Man there used to be ****loads of them back in the day. Dont think I ever played one though.

[MattyD]

Most were your generic 3D shooter / actioner. I played a PS1 Army Men title that had squad-based elements (Team Assault?) and despite my penchent for squad shooters, I just couldn't deal with the controls or general clunkiness.

[JazzFunk]

There's an Army Men RTS on PS2 which is not too bad. I got an original for something stupid (?1.60) from a car boot and I found it quite entertaining in its own limited way - deffo better than the action games. The original 3rd person games are vaguely competent in execution but similar to others in the genre and nowhere near as good - which is why I'd advise you to save a few precious hours of your life and not bother with them.

[Big Seany]

I'm going to get criticised for this by Seany, our resident 2D and retro guru, but I actually chuckled when a plastic soldier commented after getting attacked, that it was merely "a plastic wound".

No criticism there mate - that is genuinely mirthsome.