Poor you.
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The Banter Thread / Banter Topic / Sean Bean
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Barclays Bank is very pleased to inform you that it is installing new drive-through cash point machines where customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable customers to make full use of these new facilities, it has conducted intensive behavioural studies to come up with appropriate procedures for their use. Please read the procedures that apply to you and remember them<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urnchemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" />
PROCEDURE FOR OUR MALE CUSTOMERS
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Wind down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Wind up window.
7. Drive off.
PROCEDURE FOR OUR FEMALE CUSTOMERS
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse back the required distance to align car window with cash machine.
3. Re-start the stalled engine.
4. Wind down the window.
5. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
6. Turn the radio down.
7. Attempt to insert card into machine.
8. Open car door to allow easier access to cash machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
9. Insert card.
10. After "Invalid Card" is displayed - Remove the aforementioned "Marks & Spencers" Charge card and insert correct Cash Point card.
11. <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urnchemas-microsoft-comfficemarttags" />Remove Cash Point Card.
12. Re-insert Cash Point card the right way up.
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
14. Enter PIN.
15. Press "Cancel" and re-enter correct PIN.
16. Enter amount of cash required.
17. Check make-up in rear view mirror.
18. Retrieve cash and receipt.
19. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.
20. Place receipt in back of cheque book.
21. Re-check make-up.
22. Drive forward 2 meters.
23. Reverse back to cash machine.
24. Retrieve card.
25. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
27. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
28. Release hand brake.
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these next two weeks are going to be emotional.
tommorow i'm going to ring up my first choice of uni and ask them if it's possible to change my course application. Considering that the course i have decided i definitly want to do does not have as high entry requirements as the course that i have recieved a conditional offer for, I am fairly optimistic that my chances will be considerably improved, and that I could even be offered a place unconditionally.
Also, at the end of these weeks I'll be finishing work, which will be an amazing relief, a cool day with my workmates and a slightly sad end to a chapter of my life, too. To make things even more eventful, I intend to ask an amazing girl there for her number before i leave, and i'm really hoping that the end of my time at work with her will be more of a beginning than an end.
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Whats on your mind at the mo.......
Ya never know - we may have some good suggestions/help for eachother
1] The pressing issue of getting a new tyre for my motor at a cost of ?111.40 (and thats the cheapest Ive found), and how I will sort that AND have enuf cash for going on the last every Sat nite till payday.
2] Wondering what the **** im gonna talk about in this presentation i gotta do next week
So whats on your mind at the mo?Last edited by momobeast; 29-07-2005, 14:23.
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WIMMIN!??!??!?
ok, sorted the minor 'issue' with her... yesterday i said i'd do something useful(ish) on my day off but never. she got annoyed. a friend came around and we sat and played a few games when lady slinks off, she somehow gets the idea that i was ignoring her...
i had a guest, can't just leave a brother hanging.
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