The Banter Thread / Banter Topic / Sean Bean

[Spatial]

You can see their ends and everthing

[Il Postino]

urrghh!!!

[gossi the dog]

The Safeway name will be consigned to history 43 years after it opened its first supermarket - with the only temporary reminder being a few lorries still bearing its logo. Out of the 479 shops acquired in the deal, more than 200 Safeway stores have been converted to the Morrisons format, with the last four due to open under the banner tomorrow. Other stores have been sold to rivals, while a handful that are not being converted will close to shoppers on Saturday. Morrisons Chief Executive Bob Stott described the completion of the conversion as a "significant landmark" in the history of Morrisons - although the transition has been far from smooth. One of the UK's best known supermarket brands will disappear later this week when Morrisons completes the conversion of ?3bn acquisition of Safeway.

Source - COMAG C-Details.

That make me kind of sad, I spent a lot of time as a kid being dragged around Safeway in Leigh-On-Sea.

Don't they still have Safeway stores in America? Or have they gone too?

[HaHaUK]

Saw this in someones sig' on another forum:

When Bill Gates came up with the name " Microsoft " legend has it, that it was a fusion of the two words that described his penis.

It made me literally LOL.

[marcus]

Something was lost in the Translation?

Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort. We hope you enjoy them.

In a Tokyo Hotel
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

In a Leipzig elevator
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator
Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Athens
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

In a Yugoslavian hotel
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

In a Japanese hotel
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

On the menu of a Polish hotel
Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

In a Bangkok dry cleaner's
Drop your trousers here for best results.

Outside a Paris dress shop
Dresses for street walking.

In a Rhodes tailor shop
Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

A sign posted in Germany's Black forest
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.

In a Zurich hotel
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

In a Rome laundry
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency
Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

In a Swiss mountain inn
Special today -- no ice cream.

In a Bangkok temple
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Tokyo bar
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office
We take your bags and send them in all directions.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

In a Budapest zoo
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor
Specialist in women and other diseases.

In an Acapulco hotel
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

In a Tokyo shop
Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner
Cooles and Heates If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance
- English well talking.
- Here speeching American.

[Dirty Sanchez]

I stayed in the Holiday Inn in Brentford Lock last week, sign on the inside door on the room safe

'Danger - Risk of Suffocation'

You could get about 3 cans of coke in the safe............

[SubparMario]

..

[Concept]

Room pictures. You'll have to forgive the worn out desk, but after picking up a HDTV and likely to be getting a 360 before the year is out, I don't have ?150-200 spare to buy another large size one at the moment. The old desk wouldn't have been able to hold the weight of the Samsung.

Hence the reason everything had to be moved about (including removing the music system and its speakers attached to the wall in the far corner where the consoles partially now sit - you can't see some of them off the end and underneath).

Mmm. VGA.

Now I've just got to wait until the official component cables come, and then it's Colossus, Resident Evil 4, Viewtiful Joe, Soul Calibur II (picked up today), F-Zero and GT4 heaven.

[marcus]

[Ish]

Concept - I bought the 32" version of that very same TV today after seeing a 360 running on a HDTV. There was no way I could stomach using my CRT for the 360 after seeing it run in high definition. My bank account has taken a serious pounding this month: 360, HDTV, holiday booked. Ouch.

[Kieran76]

I, like many people on here, have the same television. Wonderful isn't it?

[Pavey]

I know this has been asked many times before,a few by me,whats the model number of that tv,how much is it,and what are the inputs?

Tanks a milyon.

[Ish]

Lovely. I've been looking enviously at peoples photo's of them and just about managing to resist as I have a very good CRT. But seeing the 360 run on one my card was whipped out of my pocket with gaming like reflexes. It was just too damn nice!

[Pavey]

Oh,and can you wall mount it?

[Concept]

Concept - I bought the 32" version of that very same TV today after seeing a 360 running on a HDTV. There was no way I could stomach using my CRT for the 360 after seeing it run in high definition. My bank account has taken a serious pounding this month: 360, HDTV, holiday booked. Ouch.

I'm aiming to get a 360 myself this month, though I doubt it'll be possible now. It's a lovely screen, despite the few problems I have with it (pixel related).

In particular, Half-Life 2, Chronicles of Riddick (looks gob-smacking) and Manhunt each appear absolutely sumptious on the screen, and are excellent examples of why high definition is the way forward for console gaming. I'd played those titles on my TFT in high-res of course, but the clarity of the Samsung screen (and the fact it's my first widescreen) just propel them to another level in terms of immersion.

Manhunt in particular is incredible thanks to the benefits of this television.

I hate to join the song and dance, but Microsoft are bang on the money about the extra immersion the HDTV experience can bring to the table. The games I've tried feel very elegant on a better display.