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Reviews of retro video games

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  • Gears of War: Judgment Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Gears of War: Judgment Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Gears of War: Judgment is the latest in the third person action series and the first to be developed jointly by developers Epic and People Can Fly. It tells a well-integrated side story that enriches the Gears background and brings some inventive multiplayer offerings to the table, alongside a heavily reworked campaign model.
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  • Fugitive Hunter: War On Terror Review - Sony PS2

    Fugitive Hunter: War On Terror Review - Sony PS2

    To be rendered speechless is to find oneself at a confounding intersection of thoughts and feelings. One stimulus for this may be a work of profound genius – something so otherworldly in its excellence that the only response is silent awe. Another one, more common and arguably more enjoyable, is that of supreme, insane stupidity. Fugitive Hunter: War On Terror is a game about lunatics, by lunatics and most definitely for lunatics. Its idiocy, in fact, is of such overwhelming strength that, having...
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  • Daemon Vector Review - Microsoft Xbox

    Daemon Vector Review - Microsoft Xbox

    Pop quiz: Take a guess which is the odd one out. 1) Video Games, 2) Films, 3) Music. Answer: Video Games. For the simple reason that bad songs and bad films can often become incredibly funny. If you've ever experienced films such as Dolemite, or songs from the Villain Thievz, then you'll agree. Bad video games cannot ever be funny.
    The reason? Firstly, the cost. Imagine spending £40 on a prostitute and realising that she's blind, and that ’she’ is a he. That wouldn't be funny. S...
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  • Comic Jumper: Adventures of Captain Smiley Review - 360

    Comic Jumper: Adventures of Captain Smiley Review - 360

    So many games try their hand at comedy, and so many games fail. Comic Jumper’s stats screen is proof that it’s done it right, but from its plot to its script to its characters to its set pieces it’s the funniest game of the year, without question. The absurd fourth-wall breaking plot sees star of his own comic book series, Captain Smiley lose his readership base. His comic book is cancelled and he has to find a way to win back his fans to earn a relaunch, and so he guest stars in other pu...
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  • Hypership Out Of Control! Review - Microsoft Xbox360 XBLIG

    Hypership Out Of Control! Review - Microsoft Xbox360 XBLIG

    Staring grimly out into the abyss, you sit in the Captain’s chair. Your knuckles turn a deathly shade of white as you grip the soft calf-leather, Ferrari-red and hand-stitched, of course, in your multi-billion pound star-ship. The creeping realisation that the end is near blurs your mind like a dim fog on a Sunday morning in Glasgow. Red lights flash meaninglessly in the background, the klaxon has been turned off now; it won’t do any more good. Total engine failure has crippled your ship. You...
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  • Castlevania: Lords Of Shadow Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Castlevania: Lords Of Shadow Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Castlevania is revered, not just by the protagonists of its many games, but by the gaming public at large. Dating back to the Belmont’s first outing in 1986 the series has gained critical success and a cult following. Mercury Steam, a Spanish game developer won the opportunity to update the Castlevania franchise for the current generation. Lords of Shadow is their first crack of the whip.
    The story is set in 1047. The titular Lords of Shadow have risen to power and are preventing the s...
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  • Vanquish Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Vanquish Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    From noted Japanese game director Shinji Mikami comes Vanquish. The fourth game in the collaboration between development team Platinum Games and distributor Sega is a sci-fi, third-person shooter, which despite looking generic in screenshots is actually miles apart from its genre-packed competition. Clever ideas mean that it retains a strong identity of its own. Vanquish is a gamer's game demanding to be played and mastered thoroughly. A title that always makes its action feel fresh and exciting,...
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  • Snapdots Review - Nintendo DS DSiware

    Snapdots Review - Nintendo DS DSiware

    There’s a line to be drawn, but where do you draw it? When a game shamelessly re-uses content from another game is it always bad, or is it okay if there’s some tenuous link between the two games?

    Back in 2001, Compile’s Guru Logic Champ was released unto the world. It’s perhaps the greatest puzzle game on the GameBoy Advance, and certainly in the top three.
    In it, you had to solve puzzles by rotating a grid of squares and shooting a limited number of blocks before sucking them ...
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  • Home Star Portable Review - Sony PSP

    Home Star Portable Review - Sony PSP

    So the background first. The Homestar systems are portable planetarium projectors made by SEGA, intended for domestic use, and retail for around 20-25'000yen. The main restriction with gadgets like that will always be how brightly they can project over an average size room. Homestar Portable for the PlayStation Portable doesn't have this problem.
    It's not a game, but an astronomy tool for the PSP generation. The view of the heavens depends on the position of the observer on the Earth. This ...
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  • Splatterhouse Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    Splatterhouse Review - Microsoft Xbox360

    If Namco’s original Splatterhouse is indebted to Sean S. Cunningham’s Friday 13th in any way, it’s clearly the protagonist's penchant for winter sports headgear. It’s all very well setting a scrolling beat-em-up in a grisly mansion populated with the un-dead, but exacting gory revenge with a metal pipe wouldn’t be half as pleasing without offering that old slasher movie axiom: the mask.
    Back in 1988, Namco used Jason Vorhees’ iconic hockey mask to separate Splatterhouse from its forbe...
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  • Motion Gravure Review - Sony PS2
    by Archives
    In this image-obsessed industry, it's critical that a game projects a strong sense of identity. With an identity comes a target audience. Sony have arguably captured the 'twenty-something male' flag and, to consolidate this position, Sony Music Entertainment releases this: a game featuring nothing but scantily clad females. Oh, and some very nice scenery.
    ...
    21-08-2023, 12:13
  • Devil May Cry 3 Review - Sony PS2
    by Archives
    Family reunions tend to follow one of two distinct protocols: everyone meets up, reminisces and has a good old chat and a laugh; or everyone meets up, reminisces and remembers why it’s been so long since they last saw each other, the evening ending in a ferocious argument. Why is this relevant to this Devil May Cry 3 review?
    The latest meeting of the divinely comedic twin siblings of Dante and Vergil falls rather violently into the second category. Something about their murdered mother’s amule...
    06-09-2022, 08:30
  • Silent Hill 3 Review - Sony PS2
    by Archives
    Fear. It’s something that collective consciousness values as a desirable commodity, especially in the pop culture spin of everyday modern life - An element that mainstream entertainment likes to use in distilled form when it comes to getting a rise out of our adrenaline glands. Whether it be watching the latest slasher flick, experimenting with the next extreme sport or avidly reading the current best-selling horror fiction… On the whole, we take pleasure out of being scared. Read this Silent...
    11-07-2022, 13:50
  • Viewtiful Joe Review - Nintendo Gamecube
    by Archives
    Pink Lycra. There just isn't enough of it in video games. So Capcom have bravely stepped-up to the plate and given us a game, starring a Hot Pink hero, clad in a spandex jumpsuit, that isn't afraid to be laid back and humorous in style, whilst containing some rock-solid gameplay at its core. Like a piece of candy with a stone centre, Viewtiful Joe is sweet and tempting to the eye, but underneath is solid rock. Our hero is introduced in the opening cut-scene as a bubble-headed, California-accented Sk8r Boi, o...
    15-05-2022, 11:48
  • Castlevania: White Night Concerto Review - Nintendo GBA
    by Archives
    Castlevania: White Night Concerto is the latest instalment in Konamis Castlevania series. It is the second title for the GBA, but the first Castlevania game appeared on the NES back in 1987. It is ostensibly a platform game, like its predecessors. Certain things have remained constant throughout the series- in all but a couple of Castlevania outings, the main protagonist (in this case Juste Belmont) brandishes a whip. Secondary weapons are also available. Again these weapons are the same as tho...
    03-04-2022, 15:57
  • Super Robot Wars OG Saga: Mugen no Frontier EXCEED Review - Nintendo DS
    by Steven Walker
    For the uninitiated, Super Robot Wars Original Generation Saga: Mugen no Frontier (Endless Frontier) is an action-RPG spin-off from the popular Super Robot Wars series. The player has to use attacks to keep enemies in the air in order to do maximum damage, and string together as many attacks as they can. Timing and knowledge of characters' moves is the key to success. SRW OG Saga: Mugen no Frontier EXCEED is the sequel, and goes to show that a follow-up can be better than the original.
    T...
    04-01-2022, 14:20
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