The Relationship Thread-Good, Bad or Indifferent.

[kryss]

Just goes to show we're getting old.

['Press Start']

I think if people are honest with themselves, drop the ego and the fake social mask (for some internet mask) most wear then they will find a more realistic happiness. Both for themselves and in relationships.

Also most need to ignore media (as per Dogg Thang's excellent post) and even what the 'Jones's' are doing as trying to live someone else's life will leave yours empty.

Although I will say mine and my Wife's relationship is the all in one companion type. Soul Mates exist.

[Mayhem]

Pretty much agree with Dogg Thang too. I get the sneaking suspicion that my current other half feels like she has to fill all of those roles, and tries to overcompensate a little, and feels a bit put out if I happen to go to someone else first. She isn't needy, not by a long shot, which is part of her attraction, but she is a bit younger than me, and perhaps isn't quite as realising that relationships are a bond, but not cutting every one else out. I see that a bit admittedly... suddenly one of your friends gets a new girlfriend, and you're lucky to see them again for the next year.

So, has anyone heard of the Japanese "social phenomenon" of "herbivore" men and women?

The American guy in Japan who wrote the GaijinSmash blog covered this in a couple of his columns, which is how I first heard about them.

[charlesr]

According to the database error log, dazzling_bubble has been trying to post some good news, but the image link they are trying to use is longer than the maximum allowed packet. Please post again but just with some text.

Unless the forum was just getting jealous: "Got a packet bigger than 'max_allowed_packet' bytes"

[kryss]

Can you not stick the image link in bit.ly and post it for us? I mean, her...

[charlesr]

It was vast and spanned 3 error log emails. So no. I suspect it was her browser having a fit.

[randombs]

I'm nuts over this girl from work who I'm trying to get serious with. Dunno what to call it, I've never been good with women(been out with a few but they've never lasted more than a few weeks mainly because I just stop them for some reason or other) cos I'm such a Mr. Nice Guy, and we're not really going out or anything but she likes me, too. She was relieved when I finally pegged that she hadn't been flirting as some kind of piss-take.

Initially I thought 'No way, Bill. Abort. Abort' because she's a party girl and I'm basically a granddad. I'm convinced she'll get bored of me soon enough but she keeps ticking more bloody boxes than an immigration form that it's going out of control now and I've decided to take a plunge.

So just when I've been thinking there's no way we could ever meet in the middle and our lifestyles are soooo different and I'm trying to keep away and see distance helps, she quotes from Napoleon Dynamite. I almost fell over. Just a blip, I thought, but apparently not. Today she was talking about Monkey Island and when I told her I've got it on my iPhone her eyes nearly popped out. And she knows what Street Fighter is. And she played a Sade song.

Seems she's had bad experiences with dick men who lie through their teeth(she thought I was lying when I told her I've never had a proper gf) and God knows where this is headed but for now she's one of my two focuses in life(the other being the piano) and I'm just doing whatever I can for her because it seems like she needs it. I feel like Crimson Bolt in Super in that I might only be what she needs right now but frankly I don't care. I decided recently to start doing things for people purely for the sake of doing them rather than getting some kind of fuzzy feeling or pancakes or something and I'm sticking by that.

Last few weeks have been topsy-turvy, though

[Fader209]

Psst, Billy's in love. Pass it on

Good feeling right? Hehe it's great when things just click with someone.

[randombs]

It's the perfect timing because I've recently started refining my tastes. The only thing in life where I crave variety is music. With everything else I'm happy with one or two - friends, games, films, etc.

No other woman registers with me any more. I haven't used the L word. I've used the word besotted so far which she tried to shoot down but I think it's because she's used to people saying that kind of stuff and not meaning it. I'd rather mean it and not say it if that makes sense?

I told her that any holding back on my part isn't through a lack of interest but that she's like a robin in my garden. When a robin shows up I'm just chuffed that it's chosen my garden. It might be friendly but I don't wanna make any sudden movements in case it flies away so instead I stay reading my book and being content with its presence, worried all the time that the robin might get bored and leave but thinking it's better it leaves out of boredom than fear.

"Is that what you think? That I'm gonna fly away?"

[chopemon]

Ask her out.

[randombs]

So very succinct

We've already gone out a few times but I guess a proper dinner with violins and candles and stuff is in order

[kryss]

It's the perfect timing because I've recently started refining my tastes. The only thing in life where I crave variety is music. With everything else I'm happy with one or two - friends, games, films, etc.

No other woman registers with me any more. I haven't used the L word. I've used the word besotted so far which she tried to shoot down but I think it's because she's used to people saying that kind of stuff and not meaning it. I'd rather mean it and not say it if that makes sense?

I told her that any holding back on my part isn't through a lack of interest but that she's like a robin in my garden. When a robin shows up I'm just chuffed that it's chosen my garden. It might be friendly but I don't wanna make any sudden movements in case it flies away so instead I stay reading my book and being content with its presence, worried all the time that the robin might get bored and leave but thinking it's better it leaves out of boredom than fear.

"Is that what you think? That I'm gonna fly away?"

EDIT:: Anything even looking like advice about dating and women from me is removed from this post.

No MJDX posting yet? Hmm...I feel I should make a comment about back doors being broken.

Yeah, clicking like that is a great feeling. Only seems to happen to me with women who are already in long term relationships. I guess I just don't meet people. Otafest this year I do plan on going to the speed-dating that I missed last year. Might take the night off work and go to the disco as well

No text-based adventures like last year though sorry.

[endo]

We've already gone out a few times but I guess a proper dinner with violins and candles and stuff is in order

Absolutely! Take her to Pizza Hut and don't forget the vouchers.

[Fader209]

Absolutely! Take her to Pizza Hut and don't forget the vouchers.

I had forgotten about that Who was it who did it? Not that using vouchers is bad or anything but the issue was a bit funny.

I think violins and candles could be a little OTT as like you say you don't want to scare her off, then on the other hand she might really like that...so confusing.
Where have you been out with her before?

[nakamura]

It was Elaniel. Funny story!

I wouldn't worry about the boring thing Billy, i'm also pretty boring and my wife doesn't mind. Before we met she was a right party animal, living it up most nights often polishing off a bottle of tequila herself. Once she met me she stopped instantly and never looked back. The party life, while a lot of fun and great memories is not something she misses. She loves just being with me and our daughter.