The Banter Thread / Banter Topic / Sean Bean

[Crisp_Rapper]

tomorrow afternoon i'm using my vast technical knowledge to install some speakers in my bathroom so i can listen to my tunes as i shower... i've been wanting to do this for a while but have only recently found a setup which'll please the ears. i need to make the bathroom prettier and it's an on-going project which will be out of the way soon hopefully.

i'm gonna physically install the speakers in the bath... the end sticks out and has an mdf end on it in which i can install the speakers. i'm currently doing some testing and they sound pretty ****ing good. beauty of installing them IN the bath is the bass units have the entire bath enclosure in which to breath which gives a very satisfyingly bassy sound without amazingly, sounding flat and slow.

[Rossco]

How did the speaker install go then?



Today I was bored and thought I'd tidy out my room, bad move, 4 hours later I am completely shattered. But my room is now 10 bin bags lighter of old clothes, boxes, letters, paper, random crap etc. Got rid of SO MUCH stuff, its unbelievable where it all came from! Took 3 trips to the dump to get rid of it all!

Thank god its done now though.

[Crisp_Rapper]

How did the speaker install go then?

i went shopping miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiles away from home yesterday... by the time i got home it was too late to get to the diy shop. saturday.

[Rossco]

What a pussy.

[Crisp_Rapper]

What a pussy.

??

how the blinkin' flip am i to install something without proper tooling/fittings you nutter?? mr bodge i am not. we be all about the custom fit in my house... belee' 'dat.

[Rossco]

Ok ok I believe you! Dont take it to heart.

[Crisp_Rapper]

Dont take it to heart.

i didn't, it's not like you knew my plans for the day though is it?


you crazy.

[Rossco]

I was just joking when I said that dude, why you making it out as if I hate you or something?

Forget I spoke..

[Crisp_Rapper]

I was just joking when I said that dude, why you making it out as if I hate you or something?

Forget I spoke..

smileys help, otherwise it appears a serious comment. damn interwebnet noobs...

[HaHaUK]

Back on topic....

[jimmbob]

Street fighter - The later years.

[VR46]

I'm declaring Thursday's Official Spam Day

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. Good morning, said the young man. If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.
F*ck off! Said the old lady. I haven't got any money.

And she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. Don't be too hasty! And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse **** all over her hallway carpet. If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all the traces of this horse **** from your carpet Madam I will personally eat the remainder.

Well, she said, I hope you've got a f*cking good appetite, because the electricity was cut off this morning!!!!

Mad Wife Disease

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up
behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name
Laura Lou written on it," she replied.

"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of one
of the horses I bet on," he explained.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a good
explanation."

Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up
and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which
knocked him out cold.

When he came to, he asked, "What the heck was that for?"

She replied, "Your horse called."

See attachment for the most popular guy in prison

[VR46]

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch,
but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in
the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied
she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him
around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew
a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch
was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand "You have
done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into
town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock, and no
hired hand. He returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room,
he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of
wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots."

He did as she asked, e v e r so s lo w l y.

"Now take off my socks."

He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

"Now take off my skirt."

He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

"Now take off my bra."

Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

"Now," she said, "take off my panties."

By the light of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off.

Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired."

[VR46]

Just pretend the victim is someone you hate

http://www.abunawaf.com/mix/store2/mulakama.swf

(weapons can be changed)

[EvilBoris]

I'm so bored, the missus has gone out and I'm sitting watching the Armando Iuanucci show. Noone is posting on here either