Bookmaker in a very scummy area.
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It seems we get more nutters/drunks/druggies than anything at the moment.
In our shop we get..
Alchoholic that comes in a few times a week with a new bruise or cut. Once he fell over while pissing drunk against a wall as the police were coming. His head hit the corner and cracked his head open.
A guy with a rad comb over. We called him Bobby after Mr Charlton until he appeared to grow some more hair. Now we call him Robert Rooney.
A man in a dress. Much be a split personality as he comes in some days in normal clothes and others with a handbag and a dress. Looks more like a coked up Miss Daisy though.
A man who stinks and spend all of his cash on booze and gambling. Will even go days without eating and hasn't had his hair cut this year. Shaved his moustache off this year and acted like it was the second coming.
We get another lad who is a top man but sometimes forgets to spray after working out and has actually made my eyes water with the B.O smell.
We had one guy who sent me a letter last week refusing to come into the shop because he was offended when I asked him if he was cold last week when he had a coat on. I had no idea it was raining outside.
Another who will tell you the same story over and over in the space of around 3 minutes.
Another who smashed the screen on the machine and walked in multiple times thinking it was ok for him to come back without paying damages.
Another who is gay as they come and often makes the most lewd comments to us he can. Very nice guy but it can get overbearing.
A pakistani man that caused a fight 3 days after me giving him a second chance which ended up with my washing his blood off my counter. He also walks around calling all english women slags and he loves his benefits. He is about 60 and cannot read or write.
All I can think of right now!
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Originally posted by nakamura View PostIt seems we get more nutters/drunks/druggies than anything at the moment.
In our shop we get..
Alchoholic that comes in a few times a week with a new bruise or cut. Once he fell over while pissing drunk against a wall as the police were coming. His head hit the corner and cracked his head open.
A guy with a rad comb over. We called him Bobby after Mr Charlton until he appeared to grow some more hair. Now we call him Robert Rooney.
A man in a dress. Much be a split personality as he comes in some days in normal clothes and others with a handbag and a dress. Looks more like a coked up Miss Daisy though.
A man who stinks and spend all of his cash on booze and gambling. Will even go days without eating and hasn't had his hair cut this year. Shaved his moustache off this year and acted like it was the second coming.
We get another lad who is a top man but sometimes forgets to spray after working out and has actually made my eyes water with the B.O smell.
We had one guy who sent me a letter last week refusing to come into the shop because he was offended when I asked him if he was cold last week when he had a coat on. I had no idea it was raining outside.
Another who will tell you the same story over and over in the space of around 3 minutes.
Another who smashed the screen on the machine and walked in multiple times thinking it was ok for him to come back without paying damages.
Another who is gay as they come and often makes the most lewd comments to us he can. Very nice guy but it can get overbearing.
A pakistani man that caused a fight 3 days after me giving him a second chance which ended up with my washing his blood off my counter. He also walks around calling all english women slags and he loves his benefits. He is about 60 and cannot read or write.
All I can think of right now!
This is an extremely depressing view of modern Britain.
Not quite in tone with the Opening Olympic Ceremony is it?
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Originally posted by nakamura View PostIt seems we get more nutters/drunks/druggies than anything at the moment.
In our shop we get..
Alchoholic that comes in a few times a week with a new bruise or cut. Once he fell over while pissing drunk against a wall as the police were coming. His head hit the corner and cracked his head open.
A guy with a rad comb over. We called him Bobby after Mr Charlton until he appeared to grow some more hair. Now we call him Robert Rooney.
A man in a dress. Much be a split personality as he comes in some days in normal clothes and others with a handbag and a dress. Looks more like a coked up Miss Daisy though.
A man who stinks and spend all of his cash on booze and gambling. Will even go days without eating and hasn't had his hair cut this year. Shaved his moustache off this year and acted like it was the second coming.
We get another lad who is a top man but sometimes forgets to spray after working out and has actually made my eyes water with the B.O smell.
We had one guy who sent me a letter last week refusing to come into the shop because he was offended when I asked him if he was cold last week when he had a coat on. I had no idea it was raining outside.
Another who will tell you the same story over and over in the space of around 3 minutes.
Another who smashed the screen on the machine and walked in multiple times thinking it was ok for him to come back without paying damages.
Another who is gay as they come and often makes the most lewd comments to us he can. Very nice guy but it can get overbearing.
A pakistani man that caused a fight 3 days after me giving him a second chance which ended up with my washing his blood off my counter. He also walks around calling all english women slags and he loves his benefits. He is about 60 and cannot read or write.
All I can think of right now!
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The other night after a bottle of Red, a Perchment at 14%, I insisted that I just didn't feel pissed.
My wife reminding me that I had some breathalyzers in the car, at .50mg as French, so bet me a 3DS XL vs a Handbag she wants, that I would be over the limit.
I was under, only just, but under!
Where as other days I can have a glass and feel twatted.
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Originally posted by JazzFunk View PostThat's one of the finest posts I've read since adopting this 'inter-net' in 2004. Would be way cooler if you did a second list consisting of all the awesome, interesting people you must meet in said job, bet all of them are also equally interesting to hear about, plus would add a bit of balance into the mix.
Maybe when I come out of my work depression I will post some of the better times. And yeah there have been some good ones too.
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Originally posted by gIzzE View PostWhere as other days I can have a glass and feel twatted.
Can of Tesco 'premium lager' next, they've dropped the vol to 4.8% , tho they now sell in consistently cheap (?3.47) 4-packs. Hope it's still brewed in Belgium, like it always was (which doesn't apply to British Stella, and it tastes of farts like Carlsberg does).
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Tried maybe 20-25 cask beers on holiday
and
brought back 75 newbie bottles.
Result.
Best moment was when I was playing mapreader in the car journey between Evesham and Brightwell-cum-Sotwell. It was boiling and I had the car window down. Something flew through the window (we were travelling at about 50mph), battered against the dashboard, and rebounded to land between my legs. From the blur of colouring, I knew it was a bee. I let out a howl of angst, and barked out 'stop the car, my knob is in mortal danger here' orders. We happened to be passing a Millets farm shop, and pulled in. I leapt out of the car, and managed to remove the bee from my cock-pit. A bit shaken, I decided to pop into the shop. 28 new beers bought!!!!! I could have had 50, but there just wasn't room in the motor. The wifey on the checkout had to hunt out boxes for me. Superb - I'd have never stopped there normally. Thank you Mr Bell-Bee!
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