The Relationship Thread II: Ding Dong - The Bells Are Gonna Chime

[Neon Ignition]

If she's nothing like your ex is probably means she's less likely to do to you what happened last time - bonus!

[Cassius_Smoke]

[MENTION=3332]MrKirov[/MENTION] You're still going to have the memories of your Ex rattling round your brain probably for years. The important point is to achieve closure, not from her personally, but from within yourself. Accept that you will think about her, and compare, and I wouldn't feel guilty about it or try to suppress it, it's propably just the way your mind is working through it.

[MrKirov]

Thanks all.

We ended up having a chat yesterday, shes been through similar experiences in dating as me, and was a bit on edge waiting for the bubble to burst and for me to leave suddenly, so at least we are on the same page. After chatting, we've been seeing each other over two weeks, and seen each other about 8-9 times? Its been really good. Shes already leaving slippers and toothbrushes and make up wipes and that around mine, so she seems fairly happy.

We actually agreed to be "exclusive", or an "item" or "BF/GF" - whatever you wanna call it. But we agreed like we had both been seeing each other for months, not weeks- so it kinda felt right. Talking about it and agreeing helps us both with our concerns about the bubble bursting or letting our guards down after so much crap, so its good!

I also went and adopted a cat yesterday, i'm having him Wednesday. The ex wants to sell the house now and I was planning on getting one- but stopped my plans because of the upheaval/viewings etc. Then I thought- why am I trying to make things easier for her? I'm not putting my life on hold for her- and if I have a cat when I have to move- she can wait until I find somewhere I want to go and can bring the cat with me.

So yeah, right now, things are looking less bleak.Spent about 3 hours playing Overcooked co-op yesterday too, she refuses to move on until we get 3 stars on each level

[Sketcz]

Okay, need some advice folks.

I’ve been seeing this girl for two weeks. Things are going amazingly, she’s just fallen asleep on the sofa at my house after I cooked dinner, we had a few beers and she tried Resi 7 VR (this is the second girl- turns out she’s a closet nerd and likes games..!)

I couldn’t ask for more. She’s super into me, brings food and beer and starters and that when she knows I’m cooking. She even does the washing up for me! She texts when she’s not around, very complimentary, hot, great in bed- I don’t think a guy could ask for more. So far, it’s really great, and haven’t thought of another woman.

However- she’s around mine, we are comfortable talking, watching TV and games- but I can’t stop thinking about my old relationship? I mean. It’s what we used to do, but obviously 10 years on, it’s difficult not to compare- and part of me misses the comfort of being together for so long before? I don’t know why. It’s done, this is going great- but I can’t atop having the thoughts creep in about how it was even easier before because obviously we knew each other better, and it was... easier? I dunno.

I don’t even know what I’m trying to say, but the thought of missing it from
before is there, even though I’ve kind of got it again now?

Any advice folks?

Jesus, this is easy Kirov. Print off a photo of the face of the lady from your previous relationship, bit of string each side of the print out, suggest to the new girl she wear the facemask as a bit of "role play". Works every time.

[kryss]

[MENTION=3332]MrKirov[/MENTION] sounds like you should both just be happy for a bit.

Although I would not hold up on the sale of the house just to piss off your ex, get it done and sever those ties as fast as possible even if it means renting for a while. Speaking as someone who can be quite petty, it comes across as petty and vindictive.

[MrKirov]

[MENTION=3332]MrKirov[/MENTION] sounds like you should both just be happy for a bit.

Although I would not hold up on the sale of the house just to piss off your ex, get it done and sever those ties as fast as possible even if it means renting for a while. Speaking as someone who can be quite petty, it comes across as petty and vindictive.

Oh definately not holding it up!! Just mean having a cat will reduce the ease of giving an estate agent a key and doing viewing when I’m not there- and means viewings would have to be on a weekend or when I’m there. Also, I mean that once it’s sold, I’m in no rush to suddenly get out- whether I rent or buy/where etc is something I’ll deal with then. I was putting off getting another cat because it would make that decision possibly harder and make the selling process harder - but I mean I thought, **** it- I’m not delaying my wants and plans because she’s decided she’s ready to sell.

Just mean that, definately not planning on holding it up, just not feeling obliged to rush out- I’ll make plans and stuff as and when, and not restrict myself based on something that may or may not happen sooner or later.

[MrKirov]

So. I broke up with the girl I was seeing. Twice!

Been on another date already, and have another soon. Such is life.

BUT I got another cat

[Cassius_Smoke]

So. I broke up with the girl I was seeing. Twice!

Been on another date already, and have another soon. Such is life.

BUT I got another cat

What happened?? I thought you were getting on and things were cool?

[MrKirov]

What happened?? I thought you were getting on and things were cool?

Started out great, but she had some issues of her own, just meant that the longer we were together, the more she thought she had to lose and started overcompensating and getting really clingy or needy.

I broke it off, then though my perhaps it was partially my issue, and not being attentive enough or whatever, then within a few days it was the same thing again so I had to end it again.

A shame, when she wasn’t imploding she was lovely, kind, caring- but alas wasn’t meant to be.

[Cassius_Smoke]

Back in the saddle then...

[gunrock]

Easy, man. He's got a new pussy to tend to!

[MrKirov]

House viewings today.

Sitting here smashing back whiskeys.

Thinking I’ll be forever alone.

Onto the gin.

[MrKirov]

Can’t even stress eat.

****ing intermittent fasting.

[prinnysquad]

I think you should stroke your new pussy rather than chase it.

You need to take time to settle into this life. All this dating is chaotic and doing you no favours.

[MrKirov]

Pretty much what I’m doing. Although it gets very boring, very quickly. That why I’ve started training again, alongside the new cat. Just something to focus on and feel less alone.