The Relationship Thread II: Lost in that Last Goodbye

[sj33]

Have you tried using the subscription sites such as eHarmony? Because of the paywall and extremely time-consuming questionnaire you have to complete upon registration, it filters out those who aren't so serious. Most people I know who use such services say that eHarmony is mainly used by people who are genuinely looking for a relationship.

[Ghost]

No, I tried match.com I think years ago and only got a couple of responses from that. Will look into eHarmony but paying ?30 a month or so for a dating site way too high, but as you said, if it filters out the time wasters it might be a good investment

[kryss]

eHarmony was just as much a waste of money as Match.com for me. Save the cash and do something fun instead.

The language clubs at uni here try and attract visiting students who have more diverse age ranges. I'm 32 and met my gf at the Japanese Culture and Conversation Club at UofC and she was 32 in January and here to study English.

[dvdx2]

This isn't exactly a relationship story but i think I'm going to stop using dating sites altogether. About two weeks ago I started chatting to this woman on okcupid, we have pretty much the exact same interests and are looking for the same thing, after a few days and about 20 emails later we exchange numbers and begin chatting on whatsapp, with one night us chatting for 4 hours straight. So things are going well I thought. On Monday I give her a call and we chat for about 30 mins before going to bed, she's going to new york for a few days today so we arrange to meet up for the first time next Saturday after she gets back. I don't hear from her at all on Tuesday and I didn't contact her either, on Wednesday I text her and ask how she is, don't get a reply. I leave it and text her again Thursday night asking her how she's getting on with her essay, still don't get a text back. Yesterday I was working on a TV set and sent her some pics and asked if she was excited about her trip to NY, still nothing.

So it's gone from chatting every single day to me being completely ignored, as far as I know I haven't said anything to offend her and I've not been constantly sending her messages either. I thought it might be because she has been really busy and not had chance to reply but on whatsapp she has been online and read all of my messages, she's also been posting on Facebook in that time and has also edited her profile page on Cupid. This has really pissed me off and sadly it's not the first time something like this has happened, if a girl decides she's no longer interested or she's met someone else fair enough, but they should at least have the decency to just say so rather than just ignore you completely and hope that you just give up, especially when a person hasnt said or done anything to justify being treated like that. I consider it a lucky escape and would rather not go out with anyone who thinks treating people like that is acceptable but it's infuriating because being ignored is one of my biggest pet peeves and it also feels like a complete waste of time as well.

Only problem is at my age (30) it's difficult to meet and date women, nearly all of the girls at uni and work are 10 years younger than me and I have no interest in night clubs or bars

I feel your pain, but you have to take online dating with a pinch of salt and grow a thick skin. Dont look at any of her social networking sites any more and move on. Better to find out now that shes a time waster than 2 mths into the relationship. It took me over a year to meet someone on match affinity, and i dated many a time waster in that time. Chin up, move on.

[Brad]

Nothing inherently wrong with online dating but it's not a magic wand. There are time wasters and incompatible matches in the real world too. I used my single friend and thought it was great. Don't give up!

[MisterBubbles]

Didn't know you where dating now Kyrss, just thought you was having fun with her, but congratulations.

[prinnysquad]

Kryss doesn't do casual ragshagging.

He met her for coffee on a Monday, dated her on the Tuesday, and proposed on the Wednesday.

[gunrock]

...and Thursday and Friday and Saturday. They chilled on Sunday...

[kryss]

Didn't know you where dating now Kyrss, just thought you was having fun with her, but congratulations.

Dating can be fun too you know.

[Lyris]

Anyone here's sex drive shut itself off after moving to a different country?

I'm actually seeing a girl at the moment and although I wouldn't like to lose her, my brain is being remarkably... casual about the whole thing. Maybe that's good, maybe I'm finally experiencing a normal "meh" relationship!

[kryss]

Mine is the same the world over.

[gunrock]

Stress of moving to a new place and settling in?

[Brad]

Becoming gay?

[cutmymilk]

You are just not that into her, dude. Chemistry is a funny thing.

[Lyris]

Mm, I'd be surprised. I think gunrock's answer is the right one

Brad: gave me a laugh, but no