Start liking Siriusmo again, lol.
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Gotta wait n see...I've only had two doses, so far, and it's not even 48hrs since I took the first one.
They're either gonna totally zombify me or give me a sheen.
Can't tell right now but my gut is sensing summat decent, though I had a terrible bout of anx about 8pm.
We shall see. Gotta give it at least a 14-day trial but shall keep reporting.
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I'm sorry to hear that Neon, remember to take some time for yourself (No matter how brief) to make sure you're grieving too.
2020 check in for myself: Work's been both rubbish and excellent last year. I was a lead, looking after 2 other guys in the office but I wasn't just a manager, I could lead the team where I wanted, I could test and code how I thought was best and my 2 guys had a level of autonomy that let them get on with it. Despite this, their were some issues, 1 guy needed reigning in, 1 needed pulling up and because I was a lead, I had to answer other people and make tough decisions. With all of that, came a level of stress that did effect me.
Now our little studio has been brought out by a US firm, all the developers and test team who were leads are now senior, and we've lost any sense of teamwork as all of us have been given new work to do for parts of the US team. Originally, this sucked but as the months rolled on, I realise all the stress of being a manager has been removed. I don't have to authorise sick leave and holiday, don't have to pull my team up, am no longer the focus of bugs from our customer support team, don't have to choose the direction for test. All of that has been removed and I'm really starting to feel the benefits. Being someone who suffers from anxiety, I still have my moments, but I'm slowly unpicking myself from years of stress and it feels good.
I have to pinch myself sometimes; From someone who was an undiagnosed suffer of anxiety in my early 20's with little direction in my life, paid peanuts to work for under-appreciating game developers who broke my confidence to where I am now; Working from home on a Friday, coding on my MacBook, paid 5 times the amount I used to be and I have a real handle on my mental health; Both when I'm feeling good to when I'm feeling low.
As with all things in life, there's never a constant, life keeps changing. So none of us in this thread will always be 100%, I just aim to have fun and look after myself. When I acknowledge I'm not feeling great, work on why I'm feeling like this and try to remember; A dark day will eventually turn into a sunny one.
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