Official Edge Thread - Christmas 2003 Issue

[Tig]

From what I hear all the negative comments are centred around the single-player game... over too quickly, not enough to unlock, cheaty AI and so on. But I never heard this criticism of MK64, a game which could be pretty much 100%-ed in a wet afternoon and had practically nothing to unlock. Hmmm.

[Moodmon]

How can anyone criticise a mag with Optimus Prime on the cover. I mean...it is Prime! It has the autobots logo on the reverse. Yes, it may be tatty Armarda, but...

[Crispin]

How can anyone criticise a mag with Optimus Prime on the cover. I mean...it is Prime! It has the autobots logo on the reverse. Yes, it may be tatty Armarda, but...

Don't mock Armada. Apart from the voice acting! And the 'Gotta Catch 'Em All!" undercurrent. The VA is almost as bad as a Takara episode.(buy Transformers the Movie on DVD and it comes with an episode. So bad! What did they do to my baby?)

Actually, I lie, the fat kid and his mate are so funny. Superb VA from those two. As good as anything on anything you care to mention, even undubbed Trigun! Going on about his psychiatrist all the time and his insulin levels. Totally surreal and something you wouldn't expect. It really is a case of WTF? How can they even get away with him saying that.

Why is it the comedy parts that are always the best?

[Crispin]

Oh yeah, they ****ed over Megatron real good. And Starscream. And cyclonus. And Optimus Prime's other forms.

Bring back G1 designs I say!

[Moodmon]

Don't mock Armada.

I decided not to read the rest of your post.

No, Armada is bad, not just by G1 standards, but standards of cartoons today. Look at stuff like TMNT (especially the episode where Casey Jones first appears. It's just one long piss take of Raph) and new He-Man (surprised me by not being awful).

And the fat kid reminds me of myself. And for that, he must burn! And they ruined laserbeak. And Megatron. And who is Scavenger? And what's with the star sabre? Dear god, make it stop...

[Crispin]

Don't mock Armada.

I decided not to read the rest of your post.

No, Armada is bad, not just by G1 standards, but standards of cartoons today. Look at stuff like TMNT (especially the episode where Casey Jones first appears. It's just one long piss take of Raph) and new He-Man (surprised me by not being awful).

And the fat kid reminds me of myself. And for that, he must burn! And they ruined laserbeak. And Megatron. And who is Scavenger? And what's with the star sabre? Dear god, make it stop...

German dubbed He-man on German Satellite channels are many episodes in advance. Trust me, it gets really bad, really quickly.

They also show the original He-Man on another satellite channel, that kicks ass! TMNT isn't too bad. Apart from the alien conspiracy thingy, and the nano-bot episode and the evil dump man episode.

But wall running Ninjas are good. More please! Shredder is no longer the forgotten member of the Village People and there appears to be no Krang or Rocksteady or Bepop. On the other hand you get the annoying Purple Dragons and the smarmy street wise kids, who really have hearts of Gold.

And April O Neil isn't that annoying. They should have kept her as a scientist though! Ruff! Beats the new Teela from He-Man any day.

But Splinter whining about Soap Operas is definitely cool. Casey Jones is neat oh! And Ninjas never go out of fashion!

Is it still good, ain't seen it for a while and they didn't show it on German Channels.

Arghh, they're up to Pokemon Advance now over there IIRC. Dammit, dammit. By the time we get that, no doubt Fire Leaf version will be out and the info from Advance will be useless to me! They use different names for Pokemon over there. For example Chikorita becomes "Endeeviya" so that is a bitch to translate.

You have no idea how ****ing difficult it is to translate He-man on the go. All they do is sit there for 20 minutes and talk, talk, talk. They use really complex verbs interspersed with **** that isn't even a real word.
German Dragonball Z and Dragonball, they do this too, but it has several advantages:

1) No complex moral **** to penetrate. Very simple to translate the word "scheisse!".
2) They haven't ****ed up the character designs as it isn't an 'update'
3) You only need to listen for one word "kampf" and it's variants "kampfer", "Kampferin" or something or other. Basically it is a catch all word for battle, warrior (male or female variants), fight, training
4) No censorship of any kind. In the English version shown on places such as Cartoon Network, huge swathes of scenes have been cut out. Character's names changed. That Hercules guy (wahtever, one who claimed to beat Cell) is actually called Mr. Satan. Tao Beibei sounds better than General Tao. The characters actually swear. Mr. Satan shoots people. Majiin Boo well kicks the **** out of everything.

Actually, censorship isn't uncommon. IIRC at least 3 episodes of Pokemon will never be shown in Britain or America.
The infamous Porygon Episode
Safari Park Zone (the ranger waves a gun around all the time apparently)
Some weird transvestite episode (I know, I know, I'd like to see that too)

Why is Lazerbeak on the good side? Has Soundwave arrived yet?

[E. Randy Dupre]

Three apologies. First, for bumping this thread: I only bought this issue yesterday. Second, in case this has already been covered in the thread: I was checking, but after six pages of pointless bitching about what constitutes an average score I found I was losing the will to breathe. Third, for bringing this topic up again, but I think it's a point worth making and I can't do it in the other thread because that one's been closed because of - hey! - pointless bitching.

Anyway, that Dredd review. Code being held back from review in issue #129 because Rebellion claimed it was unrepresentative of the final release version. Eventual review, two months later and long after the game's hit the shelves, saying that there's no noticable difference between the two copies and that all the bugs and problems present in the 'pre-release' version are still there. Edge editorial staff walk out because of publisher pressure on #129. Coincidence?

[Moodmon]

You would have thought this would be a PM coversation. Oh well

Why is Lazerbeak on the good side? Has Soundwave arrived yet?

He just is. No Soundwave at all. Rubbish camcorder type thing Laserbeak anyway.

As for Pokemon Advance, I think it is on Sky One early (don't ask me why I know. I don't even have Sky). I did see an annual for it in Asda. Looks like a new female character instead of Misty. As well as a daft top for Ash.

[Gr0ver]

I've only just got round to reading it.

But the writing is ****ing shocking at times.

And I'm an unashamed Edge fanboy.

I don't know what the **** is going on. Some of the reviews just have completely disjointed/unrelated paragraphs bleeding into each other. It's shocking for a mag of such credibility, really.

It's ironic though, that the one thing that has fueled this thread for god-knows how many pages, is the one review that isn't actually that bad.

It's the Broken Sword 3/Metal Arms/Beyond Good and Evil reviews that exhibit sub-GCSE critique.

Gutted .

[marcus]

Oh my god who bumped this again?

[Shimmyhill]

you did :P