Films You Have Watched This Week: With a Vengeance

[QualityChimp]

Park Lanes is an eight hour, narration-free experimental film about a bowling equipment manufacturing plant.

"It becomes apparent that the film consists entirely of long, unbroken shots ? most between five and 10 minutes long ? of factory workers performing intricate, inscrutable tasks: connecting components, stacking parts, bending metal, sorting screws. At one point I am literally watching paint dry."

This poor guy watches it so we don't have to:

https://slm-digital.s3.amazonaws.com/Email/Mr%20Hyde/HYDE%20ONLINE.html

I saw Channel 5 were showing Firefox the other week and I recorded it to watch later. Did it in about 15 chunks, argh. I still like that film. Clint Eastwood directs and stars as an American pilot tasked with the mission to steal a top secret Russian jet that uses thought-control to speed up the use of its weapons.
The first two thirds is his character, mentally scarred from Vietnam, trying to make his way across Russia without getting caught or having a mental breakdown. The final third is his attempt to get the plane back to America, despite the odds being against him.

The full sized Firefox model was re-used as a drone for a William Friedkin directed comedy starring Chevy Chase and Sigourney Weaver called Deal of the Century. The smaller model is on display in LA in the Warner Bros. Studios Tour.

They had to invent a special process to film the black jet model where it was painted with phosphorous paint, brightly lit against a black background and then superimposed on the flight footage later. It looks ropey now, but was impressive at the time (1982)

Does anyone remember the Atari Laserdisc arcade game of Firefox?

Footage:
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[buster_broon]

What the hell is Happening with all these versus movies that's coming out

Last week I watched one called zombies vs navy seals and it was truly awful and tonight I'm surfing and there is a zombie ninjas vs black ops movie, I mean come on

[usman]

Crimson Peak


Trailer was somewhat misleading from the kind of film it was. A somewhat weak script with weird plot holes but didn't matter with the acting and set pieces on display, just very very good. Pulled me in form start to end. A very good film, well enjoyed.

A

[PaTaito]

Crimson Peak


Trailer was somewhat misleading from the kind of film it was. A somewhat weak script with weird plot holes but didn't matter with the acting and set pieces on display, just very very good. Pulled me in form start to end. A very good film, well enjoyed.

A

Must watch this, the atmosphere looks brilliant from the trailers.

[Baseley09]

TurboKid

Was pleasantly surprised at this one, I typically give things like Kung Fury a swerve as feel they may be too wrapped up in their own false sense of nostalgia, perhaps to my detriment.

Thankfully for me TurboKid avoided the wrong side of those tropes for the most part, the soundtrack was excellent in its own right and the gore quite fun. Script was bad and fell flat on a few occasions. At least decent.

[Zaki]

Chappie.

Overall I'll award it a solid Dev out of Patel.

2 out 10 then?

[Zaki]

TurboKid

Was pleasantly surprised at this one, I typically give things like Kung Fury a swerve as feel they may be too wrapped up in their own false sense of nostalgia, perhaps to my detriment.

Thankfully for me TurboKid avoided the wrong side of those tropes for the most part, the soundtrack was excellent in its own right and the gore quite fun. Script was bad and fell flat on a few occasions. At least decent.

I enjoyed Turbo Kid too.

Kung Fury felt like the same joke streched over 30 minutes. Hacker man saves it

[charlesr]

Park Lanes is an eight hour, narration-free experimental film about a bowling equipment manufacturing plant.

"It becomes apparent that the film consists entirely of long, unbroken shots ? most between five and 10 minutes long ? of factory workers performing intricate, inscrutable tasks: connecting components, stacking parts, bending metal, sorting screws. At one point I am literally watching paint dry."

This poor guy watches it so we don't have to:

https://slm-digital.s3.amazonaws.com/Email/Mr%20Hyde/HYDE%20ONLINE.html

"Man this film is boring ? provocatively, extravagantly, intergalactically boring. Take the most intense boredom you ever experienced ? the drabbest bank holiday spent with bleakest relatives ? and times it by a trillion. Now add 500. It's twice as boring as that. "

[charlesr]

What the hell is Happening with all these versus movies that's coming out

Last week I watched one called zombies vs navy seals and it was truly awful and tonight I'm surfing and there is a zombie ninjas vs black ops movie, I mean come on

[randombs]

"Man this film is boring – provocatively, extravagantly, intergalactically boring. Take the most intense boredom you ever experienced – the drabbest bank holiday spent with bleakest relatives – and times it by a trillion. Now add 500. It's twice as boring as that. "

Editing that film must've taken about five minutes. Looking forward to a condensed YouTube version!

“He's just completed work on his latest documentary,” she continues, “about a trap house in Cleveland.” Wait, what? Now that sounds like something I'd want to watch: the extreme human dramas that unfold inside a house where drugs and guns are sold. “He set his camera up across the street and filmed people coming in and out the property for eight hours.” Ah. I see. So close.

[usman]

A̶T̶T̶A̶C̶K̶ ̶O̶N̶ ̶H̶U̶M̶A̶N̶ ̶D̶I̶G̶N̶I̶T̶Y̶ ̶ ATTACK ON TITAN PART : 2


Or, 'WE SPENT ALL THE BUDGET UTTERLY CHANGING THE STORY SO ONE LOCALE AND NO 3D GEAR FIGHTING FOR YOU'


I thought the first could not be bettered in garbage-ness. I was dead wrong.

BONUS FAIL GET: Cinema full of nerds cackling like hyenas. Worse acting than a Chinese film.


D̶O̶U̶B̶L̶E̶ ̶F̶-̶ Depths of Cinema Hell++

[randombs]

I like the guy's excuse that they didn't have a Hollywood budget. You don't need one to create visuals better than what they managed.

[usman]

Japanese cinema skews to much better in general than Hollywood stuff, that's the real tragedy.

It's when they try to be wannabe Hollywood that stuff like this tends to happen.

I have never, ever seen such artificial soundtrack work. Nearly every track had the most artificial cue such that it was jarring.

The people who made this film were likely mailroom clerks with grand fantasies. This is dangerous, as when Stephen Harper, a former mailroom clerk, got it into his head to try to rule Canada. They need to be forced back to their mailrooms and locked in.

[randombs]

I'm no longer interested in Japanese films. The artsy/indie ones can be good but I've seen plenty of great Western artsy/indie films as well and, as you say, Japan may fall over when they try and copy Hollywood.

[Darwock]

I blame the directors. It has to be, because even lame ass boyband member Ninomiya-Kun came across as a proper actor when he was directed by Clint Eastwood.

Yet all the supposedly talented Japanese actors act like talking dog turds in Japanese movies/dramas.

While on the topic, worst Japanese movie I ever saw (and thus by extension, worst movie I ever saw) was the live action remake of Kiki's Delivery Service. If you want to see a point well and truly missed, you need to check this one out.