HamFace's first day:
9:01 a.m. - Announce tax cuts for 2000 richest toffs in the country. Encourage them to assume various tax-avoiding statuses anyway, just so they're likely to buy me a peerage. Increase tax burden on everyone else. Sit back and wait to receive offers for positions on boards of multinationals as reward.
9:10 a.m. - Make sweeping cuts of public services and encourage more toffs to come in and cream a mint off them in PFIs.
9:19 a.m. - Ask nanny to wipe my arse, as I will have undoubtedly shat myself with excitement, while Gorgeous George looks on.
9:26 a.m. - Tender the rights for privatising air, whereby every subject of Myself has to wear an Oxygen Usage Meter, and pay per breath. The poor and lower middle earners will doubtless start to hyperventilate with stress, which rakes in the cash for my good chums Cuthbert and Tarquin, my old Eton buddies running the company who'll win the tender.
9:01 a.m. - Announce tax cuts for 2000 richest toffs in the country. Encourage them to assume various tax-avoiding statuses anyway, just so they're likely to buy me a peerage. Increase tax burden on everyone else. Sit back and wait to receive offers for positions on boards of multinationals as reward.
9:10 a.m. - Make sweeping cuts of public services and encourage more toffs to come in and cream a mint off them in PFIs.
9:19 a.m. - Ask nanny to wipe my arse, as I will have undoubtedly shat myself with excitement, while Gorgeous George looks on.
9:26 a.m. - Tender the rights for privatising air, whereby every subject of Myself has to wear an Oxygen Usage Meter, and pay per breath. The poor and lower middle earners will doubtless start to hyperventilate with stress, which rakes in the cash for my good chums Cuthbert and Tarquin, my old Eton buddies running the company who'll win the tender.
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