Little Things That Irk You VI: The Rage Awakens

[prinnysquad]

Modern toilets.

They seem to be designed to maximise skids. I’ve tried all manner of subtle positional adjustments, and placed strategic tracks of toilet roll, but the outcome is always the same. An absolute apocalypse of cake scat-tered down the pan, like a chocolate ski slope.

My older toilets didn’t have this issue. It’s not like I’m doing all manner of freestyling crazy positions. I’m left with the same conundrum every time. Do I flush 4 times and try and scrape it off by hand, using a toilet roll oven mitt? Or coat it in bleach and hope that it corrodes off? Or try to power them off next visit using the piss cannon?

Taking a dump should be one of life’s daily pleasures. This simply isn’t on.

[kryss]

Use a gel disc or something that cleans/coats with every flush, but not one of those that goes in the tank, that's just asking for trouble.

[Blobcat]

Just don't stick it where you hit the target!

[prinnysquad]

That may be difficult. Some days it’s like I’ve fitted a sprinkler attachment to my ringpiece.

I’ll try that gel thing. Annoying that I have to, though. Twyfords and Harpic are clearly in cahoots.

[JazzFunk]

Toilet brush?

[kryss]

Fertility clinic visit today. Sperm are up to 1% normal (should be 4% or better), 10% rapid movement after 3 hours (far below benchmarks). I think Apple have been updating my sperm to make them slower on purpose.
IVF will run us $15k a time. I think "ruin us" would be a more accurate statement. FML.

Just don't stick it where you hit the target!

House rules are set to: sit the **** down, no matter where it's coming from.

[JazzFunk]

You'll get there mate.

I suggest getting frustrated, buying an 8-pack of Polish lager, doing about 250 pressups listening to music that REALLY makes you wanna go to war. Do that all night.

And get a big, phat punchbag in the cellar.

[JazzFunk]

You know what, I read that back and it makes logical sense.

The whole experience would cost less than a tenner.

[JazzFunk]

(apart from the punchbag lol)

[kryss]

I do love how you agree with your own posts publicly.

[gunrock]

[MENTION=6476]JazzFunk[/MENTION] is the Hunter S Thompson of this forum.

[QualityChimp]

Fertility clinic visit today. Sperm are up to 1% normal

Just don't stick it where you hit the target!

House rules are set to: sit the **** down, no matter where it's coming from.

I had to go back and re-read the context of Blobcat's post because Kryss made it sound like some kind of crazy bukkake party by talking about several things in one post

[QualityChimp]

I thought I had a tax rebate when I got this email:



Then I became suspicious that "[email protected]" would be handling my taxation.

[Asura]

I thought I had a tax rebate when I got this email:

I got a genuine rebate years ago and I spent half an hour re-reading the letter to be certain it wasn't telling me I owed them money. It was bizarre; good news out of a letter with a window. I felt shaken.

[Blobcat]

I got a genuine rebate years ago and I spent half an hour re-reading the letter to be certain it wasn't telling me I owed them money. It was bizarre; good news out of a letter with a window. I felt shaken.

Ditto. I got a letter saying I would be receiving a letter with the confirmed amount on soon. I STILL didn't know if it was coming or going.

Got a couple of hundred quid which came and went in a day in my overdraft and my car tax