UK IX: This Economy Will Self-Destruct In...

[Neon Ignition]

I think on a technicality Johnson receiving only one fine for attending one party is justified


I mean, it's clear the party started in March 2020 and didn't stop till this January...

[Neon Ignition]

‘The bar is open’: details emerge of new Downing Street lockdown event | Conservatives | The Guardian
The hits just keep on coming

[Asura]

Anyone want to vote for me? Manifesto as follows:

Switch to proportional representation
Move the government out of a museum and into a fit-for-purpose location in a cheaper city
Ban the concept of the party whip
All government business will use a tool like JIRA; every action, from painting the walls of an office to a major policy has a ticket with an owner history, nothing happens unless someone is able to put their name against it; this database is publicly visible
Remove all MP expenses (unnecessary for people who already earn ~£85k anyway), save for providing them an allowance for car fuel and building a university-campus style arrangement at new gov't building to provide their second home for MPs outside of commuter range from parliament
Renationalise mass-transit services such as rail, cancel HS2 in favour of modernising as much of the regular rail network as possible
Probably get assassinated before managing to do any of this

[Cassius_Smoke]

Anyone want to vote for me? Manifesto as follows:

Switch to proportional representation
Move the government out of a museum and into a fit-for-purpose location in a cheaper city
Ban the concept of the party whip
All government business will use a tool like JIRA; every action, from painting the walls of an office to a major policy has a ticket with an owner history, nothing happens unless someone is able to put their name against it; this database is publicly visible
Remove all MP expenses (unnecessary for people who already earn ~£85k anyway), save for providing them an allowance for car fuel and building a university-campus style arrangement at new gov't building to provide their second home for MPs outside of commuter range from parliament
Renationalise mass-transit services such as rail, cancel HS2 in favour of modernising as much of the regular rail network as possible
Probably get assassinated before managing to do any of this

This sounds sensible... And like socialism! Burn him!!

[QualityChimp]

To be fair, even Count Binface has some better policies than the current lot:

[Golgo]

BBC tickertape update:

More information is starting to come through, but this time on the prime minister's upcoming statement to MPs.
He is expected to say: “I commissioned this report to set the record straight and allow us all to move on.
"I accept full responsibility for my failings. I am humbled by the whole experience.
We have learned our lesson.”


It's utterly infantile - the wheedling response of a spoilt man-child.

[Golgo]

report published here: https://assets.publishing.service.go...GATHERINGS.pdf

I just had a quick skim - couldn't resist. It's hilarious, e.g. pp. 15-16: karaoke, vomiting and drunken brawling.

[Cassius_Smoke]

Doesn't say anything we don't already know. That it's basically wolf of Wall Street in there.

[Blobcat]

"I accept full responsibility for my failings. I am humbled by the whole experience.
We have learned our lesson.”

Can I copy and paste this as an excuse not to pay my car tax this year, and all other rule breaking?

[QualityChimp]

"I accept full responsibility for my failings. I am humbled by the whole experience.”

5 minutes later...

"Sir Beer Korma..."

[Asura]

"I accept full responsibility for my failings. I am humbled by the whole experience.”

5 minutes later...

"Sir Beer Korma..."

Did he say that?

[Golgo]

He did.

[Asura]

He did.

That's it, I'm done with politics for a bit. Can't deal with this.

[QualityChimp]

Did he say that?

"And after months of his frankly sanctimonious obsession, the great gaseous Zeppelin of his pomposity has been permanently punctured and irretrievably, by the revelation that he himself, he didn't mention this, he is himself under investigation, by the police, and yet, and I'm not going to mince my words, I've got to say this, Sir Beer Korma is currently failing to hold himself to the same high standards that he demanded of me."

In PMQs today.

I need to point out the sacrifice I've made for by transcribing all of that and having to do it from the GB News YouTube channel, so you didn't have to.

[Colin]

I have no words. Well, I do, but the swear filter would censor them all.