Little Things That Irk You: The Hateful 08

[randombs]

I bet a lot of people who mess up public toilets keep their private ones reasonably clean.

[Cassius_Smoke]

I was in the pub and went to the toilet. A big guy followed behind me, so I chose a cubicle. Then I hear him shouting 'I can't piss if I'm wearing clothes! I'm gunna take my clothes off to piss!' over and over, and Im thinking WTF. Sure enough when I leave the cubicle he's stark bollock naked.

[gunrock]

Sounds like he wanted someone to see his nakedness and be overcome with pash and make a move on him, [MENTION=16707]Cassius_Smoke[/MENTION]

I think there's a lot of repressed homosexuality in relatively macho places like working class pubs. I remember going to the bogs in a pub and heard two voices in a cubicle speaking and they were laying out the rules for a joint five-kuckle shuffle:

"No touching right?"
"Nah, I ain't into that"
"Right. And don't jizz on me, alright?"



Edit: BTW, I am not laughing at these people, it's obviously a bit bizarre from a "what you expect to find in pub toilets in broad daylight", but I appreciate it might be difficult for these men to be openly gay in the kind of communities they live and work in.

[Asura]

I think there's a lot of repressed homosexuality in relatively macho places

Part of me thinks that in a post-judgemental society, a lot more people would be casually bisexual.

[Hirst]

at the last half dozen posts. Someone at my old place of work did a dirty protest. All the men called into the boardroom to be made aware there was someone filthy among us. Never found the culprit ... you can't dust for faeces.

That's one of the most bonkers things, I work in an office with a secure ID card system so you know that the only people using the toilets must physically work here. Basically all white-collar, mostly middle-aged dullards. Sometimes the toilets will be absolutely full of unflushed turds and urine and screwed up paper everywhere and I always want to know who it is. I look round the office and think who are you? WHO ARE YOU???

[Asura]

That's one of the most bonkers things, I work in an office with a secure ID card system so you know that the only people using the toilets must physically work here. Basically all white-collar, mostly middle-aged dullards. Sometimes the toilets will be absolutely full of unflushed turds and urine and screwed up paper everywhere and I always want to know who it is. I look round the office and think who are you? WHO ARE YOU???

We found out who the phantom ****ter was at one of my previous jobs. That was a real walk of shame when they were marched out.

Total coincidence; they came back from holidays and we'd stopped using that toilet due to works being carried out, so when it was vandalised, they were the only person in the ~100-person department who had used it in weeks (they had footage of them using the corridor to-and-fro which just had that and a fire exit).

[Atticus]

We found out who the phantom ****ter was at one of my previous jobs. That was a real walk of shame when they were marched out.

Total coincidence; they came back from holidays and we'd stopped using that toilet due to works being carried out, so when it was vandalised, they were the only person in the ~100-person department who had used it in weeks (they had footage of them using the corridor to-and-fro which just had that and a fire exit).

Banged to ****es

[Lebowski]

Virgin bloody media, they have brought out a new TV box to rivial sky q Just called Stream from virgin media, no monthly fee and it has apps for all the big catch up services and streaming stuff. it uses a fraction of the power of our old tivo box (that we barely use as it as its prone to crashing and it overheats and is a slow horrible pain to navigate).

I asked if i could swap boxes to the new stream type box and keep my current package, you'd think this would be a simple thing. Nope the company line is "if you have a tivo box we can not offer you a Stream box". You have to cancel your current service which takes 30 days to do, then when that's finished wait two more days for the account to be classed as not having a TV service then ring back up and request a stream box, I though this was mad as they're actively making you cancel stuff if you want to add the better box to your package.

i couldnt belive this was the only way round it so checked their forums and reddit and yup loads of people saying how convoluted it is to get one of these new boxes, If their broadband wasn't so bloody good id be kicking them to the kerb.

[Neon Ignition]

I need to look at ours. We have the old, old base package for broadband, TV and phone with them but we've never even had a phone plugged in. We pay for extra kids channels and stuff like E *shudders* but scaled the broadband back to the minimum speed at the time because you never, ever use the speeds advertised thanks to the much lower bottlenecks at the other end.

It's been a good few years though and just at a glance there are so many packages that they didn't use to do. Beyond broadband and Youtube/iPlayer I'm struggling to think of anything of value that we'd lose

[Golgo]

Virgin bloody media, they have brought out a new TV box to rivial sky q Just called Stream from virgin media, no monthly fee and it has apps for all the big catch up services and streaming stuff. it uses a fraction of the power of our old tivo box (that we barely use as it as its prone to crashing and it overheats and is a slow horrible pain to navigate).

I asked if i could swap boxes to the new stream type box and keep my current package, you'd think this would be a simple thing. Nope the company line is "if you have a tivo box we can not offer you a Stream box". You have to cancel your current service which takes 30 days to do, then when that's finished wait two more days for the account to be classed as not having a TV service then ring back up and request a stream box, I though this was mad as they're actively making you cancel stuff if you want to add the better box to your package.

i couldnt belive this was the only way round it so checked their forums and reddit and yup loads of people saying how convoluted it is to get one of these new boxes, If their broadband wasn't so bloody good id be kicking them to the kerb.

Virgin are the worst. They kept increasing my tariff and I phoned them to say I wasn't happy and I wanted to move to a lower tariff with the better tech on offer. They said, basically, "no, **** you," so I cancelled them. And ever since they haven't stopped phoning to try to tempt me back.

[QualityChimp]

Virgin are the only cable guys in town, so they get my dollar, but I really, really want to be paying less.

Might just bin the lot and see how we cope on standard broadband.

[Asura]

Services can be funny like that. I spent ages on the phone trying to speak to someone on EE, as I wanted to upgrade my contract so I could get a Razer 2 Phone. I ended up going to Three, who handled it and the changeover too in <30 minutes, and I walked out with the EE contract and the phone, and EE called me literally as I was walking out the door to ask if there was anything they could do.

[fuse]

HMRC. I could elaborate, but I don't want to, so I'm leaving it at that.

[Anpanman]

Our Virgin Box is a Super Hub 3, no issues aside from Virgin updating at inopportune times.

Wouldn't mind a wi-fi 6 box as ours is wi-fi 5 but hey-ho.

[Colin]

People on eBay who state items are immaculate, or mint, yet one glance at the photos show it to be far from the case. The grumpy old man in me wants to message every one of them and give them a wee lecture. Or listing something and writing "brand new, only used a few times". Well it's not ****ing brand new then, is it? <and breathe>