Little things that irk you.. (no swearing please)

[Brats]

If they are anything like their vacuum cleaners, they'll all be broken soon.

Speaking of which, I had to buy a new vacuum the other day (because our Dyson packed in) and my irk is reviews by peole who clearly don't know what they are talking about.

Mrs Brats wanted a smaller, lighter cleaner to lug around the house. Wasn't going to buy a Dyson because of so many problems with our previous model, but they have a DC24 which is a mini version of their ball model, but much lighter and more compact. Reviews on Amazon are mostly amazing with dozens of comments like 'best vacuum I have ever bought' and 'sucks up anything I throw at it'. Thought about ordering one, but thought I would check out the local youth employment centre (i.e. Currys).

Glad I did as I found out that the power of the thing is only 650 Watts which is pathetic. Got them to test it for me and the suction power was about the same as a mouse sucking through a straw.

Bought a Miele instead which is 2,200 Watts and obliterates anything not welded to the floor. Also appears to be made like a Panzer tank. Awesome.

[endo]

I recently got a new Hoover hoover too, and it's powerful as buggery. Only had to buy it in the first place because I finally replaced our old 14-quid-from-Asda pos a while ago, which was akin to said mouse sucking through a straw, with a flash new hoover, which my twastard of an ex-landlord went and broke after me using it once.

[abigsmurf]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/ireland/7914309/Boy-5-wins-6000-in-Lidl-defamation-case.html

£6000? How exactly has this 5 year old's career been damaged? Emotional damages? What garbage, he's 5, he gets told off at home, at school/playgroup, it's not going to scar him.

Apologise and give them some vouchers but that's just stupid.

[noobish hat]

5 year olds aren't culpable for their own actions anyway! Why the hell did the shop even make an issue of it, nevermind 'imprison' him? Bunch of nutters.

[abigsmurf]

Toddlers frequently take stuff from shelves. If the mums can't be bothered to pay attention to their kids (or if they don't care), the store has to make them aware of it.

The 'imprisonment' in that case is a joke. They class holding the kids arm (for an unspecified amount of time) as imprisonment.

[Nif]

Apologise and give them some vouchers but that's just stupid.

Lidl do vouchers? That's the wife's birthday sorted.

[Ady]

We were delighted to discover those snazzy Dyson airblades in a free public loo the other day, though it was in the shopping centre at Canary Wharf, only ever seen in them pay lavs before.

I've seen them in a couple of places myself and they are a rare "treat". I also saw a "variant" which had lots of little holes rather than "blades". They did the trick but weren't as good.

[Number45]

That "Americano" song that's currently doing the rounds. Less of an irk and more of a seething hatred really, every time I hear it I want to do bad things.

[vanpeebles]

The **** in a freelander who I had to follow all the way home while he did no more than 30 in national speed limits while also braking for every corner and didn't indicate once.

[Spatial]

People with stupid questions. This week's been a belter for this including:

"What's the best laptop?" - where to start with that one. How about giving me a clue what you want to use it for?

And then today's effort from some woman leaving my work place:

"Is this the fastest way to the station?"

Bus station? Train Station? How the hell should I know?! Do I look like the AA Route Planner? It's not like I do speed runs from the front door of my office to the train station on the off chance that some wizened old bint is going to ask me how to get there at speed? How about you just go back the exact same way you got here rather than worrying about whether you're getting there faster than everyone else?!

[charlesr]

Advice to people using airblade hand driers:

Plunk your hands in and then move them up. If you slowly put your hand in, it blows the water up your sleeves at the end.

[Ady]

"Is this the fastest way to the station?"

Had me laughing out loud. Why on earth would you know something like that!?

[charlesr]

In India, people* REALLY don't like seeming to not know stuff. If you ask for directions, if they don't know, they will just make something up. Perhaps you should have used that method?

[Spatial]

I forgot to say, the best bit was where (suppressing my rage to confirm to social etiquettes ) I responded with a rather limp "...er... probably..." .

She actually glared at me and tutted like I was some of useless simpleton.



I think I should have gone with my first instinct and booted her down the steps.

[Neil]

You should have gone all Steven Seagull on her ass.