The Banter Thread / Banter Topic / Sean Bean

[NW2013]

You could at least offer to help with the painting.

[Extra Terrestrial]

I think I am in love for the first time in my life.

[Lebowski]

I think I am in love for the first time in my life.

with a battleship

[Kieran76]

First day of my 5 and a half week summer holidays! Got two promotions/extra responsiblities within 48 hours so when I start work again in September I shall be getting massive payrise.

Buster, what do you do when you ship isn't in water? I am aware that my question shows how ignorant I am about the work the Navy does.

[gunrock]

Buster, what do you do when you ship isn't in water?

Drinking, smoking, gambling and whoring.

[funkydan]

I think I am in love for the first time in my life.

with a battleship

Yeah Lebowski, I thought the same! C'mon ET, tell us about you and the boat! Is the lurvvvvvvvvve boat?

[QualityChimp]

Is it this boat?
Australia probes navy "sex game"

An investigation is under way in Australia into claims that navy sailors competed with each other to bed their female colleagues for cash prizes.
According to Channel Seven news, sailors on board HMAS Success put a cash value on each woman's head.
Sleeping with a female officer or a lesbian, or having sex in a strange place, won more money, the report said.

[EDDIE M0NS00N]

Well, I suppose u run out of things to do while youre on those salty sea's for a while!!!

I work with a guy who was in the navy when he was younger & he told me that when he & his crew arrived at ports across the world they'd go to a pub/club & if they picked up a lady their 1st words would be:

"I dont want anything serious ok. Just blowjobs & wanks"

Classic!!

[NW2013]

Why do new shoes always knacker your feet. Tried on my new pair on Monday for work and they have absolutely raped my heels. Formed two big blisters (one os about 1.5cm x 1.5cm!) which have promptly burst and the skin has also come off. It hurts to lie in bed and it hurts to walk (not good since I walk a mile to work!).

Anyone got any miracle cures?

My throat is also killing and I've got a runny nose. It's teh swine flu!

And I've got to go to the dentist and I think I'm gonna need fillings.

[buster_broon]

Buster, what do you do when you ship isn't in water? I am aware that my question shows how ignorant I am about the work the Navy does.

the ship is still running onboard

there are some portacabins ashore which hold some of the IT systems, but most of our stuff is still working onboard and i've not really been into the portacabins

other departments just catch up on paperwork, courses or loan people to ships that are short

most of my department is girls, which makes a change and its my naval birthday today

one of them wasn't born when i joined up which makes me officially old

19 years down, only another 9 left to do

if i hadn't taken the extension it would have only been 3 years left

[MarioMark]

9,999 Members! Woo!

That is all.

[Spatial]

What's the bets that member 10,000 will be a spammer trying to flog shoes or post links to donkey porn.

[Kieran76]

I hope it is. I could do with some more donkey porn.

[Spatial]

You say that, but I remember the time DaveHolliss couldn't finish his tea because of some rather horrific donkey spam (and I don't mean spam made out of donkeys).

[charlesr]

Those were the days. When spam was real spam. None of the "buy shoes cheap" stuff....