The Relationship Thread-Good, Bad or Indifferent.

[^Katsu]

Women have this off switch, you can't flip don't even waste your time trying. You have friends, a job and a future, this is where YOU build YOUR LIFE.
I still have no job, but many great friends and whilst I have from time to time shed a few tears, I am on the the up and over it now.

Keep the memories and build something better

[Skull Commander]

I'm really sorry to hear about all this. I'm afraid I don't have anything useful to add, but keep strong dude.

[Powerstar]

My girlfriend of 3 years left me in march this year.

I put on a sad face when she told me wanted to break up. Inwardly though, I was highfiving myself. I just kept asking if this was what she wanted. was she sure. etc etc. I cannot dump a girl to save myself. I used the old trick of "make em hate you". It took its suh-weet time, but by god it worked.

She left for work, and was in floods of tears the whole day according to her. What was I doing?

Jumping around the flat with music blaring, I felt like I had just gotten over cancer or something.

My first love though (different, much cuter, less satanic girl) getting dumped by her had me leading a half life for so long. I was depressed beyond belief.

[BeyondJumpFish]

Unfortunately there is no advice you can get that will help you get over it. Its your own personal battle. I know I took sollice in the fact that I knew other people had gone through the same thing and came out the other side.
Most times you will never fully understand the reason why, and thats the most difficult part, or it was for me. It cuts deep.

[JazzFunk]

My girlfriend of three and a half years left me a few days back, on the 27th, she rung me late-night to say that she wanted to finish, and hasn't got in contact since.

Nice.




(Now I can finally get around to playing Oblivion...)

[MrKirov]

Just got home after seeing my sister, who actually only lives a street across from my girlfriends house.

Ive got to admit I drove past once or twice and even parked up to go in and see her at one point. Luckily at that point my friend text me and said she was coming to my house to make sure I was okay. So had to go home.

She knows about the situation, and has had seemingly the exact situation happen to her in the past so it was good to have her on hand. She agreed with me that she seemingly doesnt know what she wants. We agreed that where things had changed over the past few months it had strained things, and that now she was working in a new place with younger people, she maybe thinks the grass is greener.

She made a good point about how she must be missing me as much as I miss her considering we were together for so long, and that everytime she lokos at the jewellry I bought her for christmas, or when my late christmas present gets delivered to her house, she will still be thinking about me, It will be hard for her two, considering the situation and that it genuinely seems like she doesnt know what she wants.

The reason this is is because she was perfectly fine with me all day yesterday, even to the point of us showering together in the morning, her falling asleep on the sofa, me touching her nose to see if she was cold so put on the gas fire to warm her up, then her waking up and calling me "sweet and lovely" and that she "loves me". Then later when I made her dinner before work she again called me "so sweet and cute and lovely" at the careful arrangement of food on the plate.

My friend genuinely agrees that something isnt quite right, and that im not getting told something. Last night I clearly asked whether she was cheating. She got very angry and said of course she wasnt. I believe her as her only relationship apart from me was with her ex of 3 years, who cheated on her. She told me earlier in the year when she mentioned breaking up that as she was cheated on when she was so in love, she tends to not think too far into the future and that she sometimes gets worried that she will be hurt again. Could this be something to do with it?

We were supposed to go out for new years for a meal. She was invited yesterday to a house party which I had no problem with at all. I guess she'll be going to that tomorrow maybe. She'll prentend shes having a good time if she does, and she can all she likes.

However, come this weekend, the first weekend that she wont have spent with me in a year. The advice ive been given is to leave her alone for a bit, give her some time, let her make her choice herself, and try to speak to her about it later. I need to get some things back including a spare house key so we have to talk at some point. Maybe we can try and chat then, see if anything comes from it.

[JazzFunk]

It's weird, even though I love her more than anything and I'm pretty shellshocked, I also feel this strange 'freedom' - I'll be losing her but also all the stressful ****e surrounding our relationship, the prime factor being her overly interfering family.

My main problem now (if it IS finally over, and part of me hopes it is) is getting my stuff back. Loads of choice CDs, DVDs and shoes I've left there. I know it'll be awkward when I do go round because we naturally get on incredibly well, and I hate to go into 'bastard mode' and find it hard being cold.

Also, I splashed out over ?200 on a Wii and games for her for Xmas. Now...do I take it back or do I nobly leave it there? I was always gonna do the latter, but seeing as she's been a bit of a cnut to me over the last few months....

Or is that a bit Alan Partridge?

[Jebus]

You shouldn't really take presents back...you intended them at the time...

[thegreathopper]

From my experience there is always someone else involved, Happened to me a few times and there was always another bloke lurking in the back ground.

[JazzFunk]

You shouldn't really take presents back...you intended them at the time...

^Yeah, I know. But if she offers....,y'know.

[briareos_kerensky]

But if she offers

Yeah, right.

[Super Grover]

You will suffer.

It will take time to get over, and in the meantime you will dream about her and have a sick feeling in your stomach when you wake up.

The next time you see her, your insides will do loops.

Your days will be filled with thoughts of her and your times together.

It will be like this for quite a while.

This is how things are.

I won't sugarcoat it for you, life in the short term is going to be sh*t.

However, it's how you come out the other side that matters. How that is depends soley on yourself.

[Decider-VT]

From my experience there is always someone else involved, Happened to me a few times and there was always another bloke lurking in the back ground.

QFT. The lack of a good reason for splitting up, rapid Facebook deletion and her anger at the suggestion she may have cheated all point to her hiding something.

[Decider-VT]

Also, I splashed out over ?200 on a Wii and games for her for Xmas. Now...do I take it back or do I nobly leave it there? I was always gonna do the latter, but seeing as she's been a bit of a cnut to me over the last few months....

Or is that a bit Alan Partridge?

If you still have it, take it back to the shop. I still had presents I bought for my ex when she split up with me just before her birthday. Took them straight back to the shop and swapped them for Power Stone 2- one of the better things to come out of that relationship.

[JazzFunk]

^I quite fancy the Wii. I know it's not a 'serious console' like the 360, it's basically a glorified Gamecube with super-duper lightgun capacities, but aimed at the game-unaware populace who seem to have caught on (and it has thusly also accumulated some pretty glowingly reviewed games, many of which tempt me now!!)

I couldn't give a slash about the cash, but it'd be nice to have a 'Wii for free' (even though I paid for it via my own bank account in the first place!)

I just KNOW I'd use it MORE, and BETTER.